Before I became a mum, people would always say to me “you will know who your true friends are once you have your baby!” (Thanks guys, super comforting…)
I definitely fell out of touch with a lot of people after the birth of my son. I mean, there are the very exciting first couple of weeks when every Tom, Dick & Harry comes to visit, but they slowly started to drop off and I don’t hear from half of them again. At this point I was asking myself “Why don’t people want to visit me now? Am I no longer any fun to be around? Am I becoming one of those mums who talks only about my kid?! Why is no one messaging or making the effort in my time of need?!”
The thing I realize now – half of the time I wasn’t being open and communicating about how I was feeling! I just expected others to know my thoughts and expected them to make the first move to communicate with me! (which is absolutely ridiculous when you really think about it!!) My friends are meant to know my thoughts and feelings without me even opening my mouth?! lol.
Something valuable I learned from this experience, and a point that is important for us all to realize is – everyone has different life rules, values and ways they look at things – so clear communication is a must. Unless you reach out and let your friends know how you are feeling, they may never know because they may see things very differently!
For example – maybe you’re thinking “I wish people would visit me more often because I am feeling lonely being home with just my baby everyday”, and our friends could well be thinking ” I don’t want to bother her with visiting because she is probably very tired and just wants to rest”.
See how different those two interpretations of ONE thought are? This stresses again, the importance of open communication and letting people know how you’re feeling! (Something I am learning because I felt as though everyone should just be able to read my mind )
So if you are feeling like nobody understands you and you are feeling isolated, I hope this blog has given you some comfort and demonstrates you’re definitely not alone. Start being proactive by making the first move. Reach out to your friends and share your feelings. They will really appreciate it! ❤
Finally, I just want to say thank you to my friends – you know who you are, I am so very lucky to have an amazing friends like you 💜